We often talk about the many things that help build a successful business. At the same time you are doing the positive work to build your business you may be indulging in self-sabotage. Recognizing and eliminating your own self-sabotaging behaviors will not only make it easier to be successful in your business it is key to living a happy life in balance with your business goals.
There are lots of things entrepreneurs do to get in the way of their own success. These are five of the most debilitating:
- Negative mindset
- Lack of self-confidence
- Doubt
- Jealousy
- Fear of failure
“Self-sabotage is when we say we want something and then go about making sure it doesn’t happen” — Alyce P. Cornyn-Selby
Has this ever happened to you? You’re thinking or wishing something would happen and then, BOOM! It happens?
There have been several times when I’ve had the uncanny experience of having thoughts that are rattling around in my head seemingly come true. Of course, I don’t have any control over this and I’m sure it is just a coincidence. But it is still pretty strange when it happens.
Unfortunately, the thoughts that come true don’t apply exclusively to my GOOD thoughts.
No. No. Of course not!
More often than not, and a little too easily I might add, my BAD thoughts are the ones that tend to rise to the surface and often manifest into reality.
The Thoughts of Self-destruction
These are thoughts that get me to the point that I question my own abilities and worthiness. Which is actually sort of amusing since this is something I would never allow another human being to do to me. Yet, here I am, doing it to myself!
Sometimes it doesn’t take long for me to convince myself that I’m not good enough or I’ll never be as good as someone who I view as better or way more successful in the exact same field.
The biggest problem is that, all too easily, I let myself forget all those positive, uplifting mantras I’ve been so diligently murmuring to myself every day.
The crazy thing is that it seems to take a lot more time and effort to build myself up and stay up with all the good and positives than it does to tear me down and give up only to rapidly decline into a sense of feeling like a failure.
The Good News
There are ways to deal with or eliminate these overly critical behaviors completely.
- Avoid the triggers. Stay away from the people, places or things that you know could possibly stir up any of these feelings.
- Trust in yourself. Get to a point where you are comfortable with yourself and have the utmost faith in your knowledge and abilities.
- Break the pattern. Come up with a plan that helps you work around what has become the typical or instinctive way you deal with these types of situations.
- Make a conscious decision to be less reactive and respond differently when certain circumstances happen that would normally trigger a self-sabotaging feeling or reaction.
- Work at it. This isn’t going to happen overnight. You have to learn and practice your responses. Partner up with some you can create practice conversations with to work through scenarios similar to those you’d typically have trouble handling.
- Ask for help. Seek out others who have experienced what you’re going through and be willing to accept their input.
And whatever you do – never give up!